Bullet Train review

BULLET TRAIN: 

BRAD PITT AND CO. KEEP THIS SILLY TRAIN RIDE ON TRACK! 

By Nico Beland

Movie Review: *** out of 4

COLUMBIA PICTURES

Brad Pitt, Aaron Taylor-Johnson, Brian Tyree Henry, Joey King, Andrew Koji, Hiroyuki Sanada, Bad Bunny, Zazie Beetz, and Michael Shannon in Bullet Train

 

            Some crazy sh*t goes down on a Japanese bullet train in…Bullet Train, the new action-comedy from John Wick co-director, David Leitch (Atomic Blonde, Deadpool 2, Fast & Furious Presents: Hobbs & Shaw) and starring Brad Pitt (Burn After Reading, Inglourious Basterds, Once Upon a Time in Hollywood). The film is based on the Japanese novel, Maria Beetle by Kōtarō Isaka, which was published in English as Bullet Train. 

I didn’t really have any expectations going into this movie, it just seemed like a fun, dumb action movie where Brad Pitt fights off assassins on a train, familiar stuff but could be very entertaining. That’s basically what I got, it doesn’t take itself too seriously and while it suffers from a convoluted plot and choppy editing, for those looking for something mindless and silly to turn their brain off for, this isn’t a bad train ride to board. 

The film follows Ladybug (Pitt), an assassin tasked to board a bullet train from Tokyo to Kyoto and retrieve a valuable briefcase. Unbeknownst to him, there are three other killers aboard the train including hitmen brothers, Tangerine (Aaron Taylor-Johnson-Kick-Ass 1 and 2, Nowhere Boy, Avengers: Age of Ultron) and Lemon (Brian Tyree Henry-If Beale Street Could Talk, Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse, Eternals) and a deceptively innocent schoolgirl known as The Prince (Joey King-The Kissing Booth trilogy, The Act, The Princess) all with connecting yet conflicting motives. 

The film also stars Andrew Koji (Fast & Furious 6, Warrior (TV series), Snake Eyes) as The Father, Hiroyuki Sanada (The Last Samurai, Rush Hour 3, Mortal Kombat (2021)) as The Elder, Michael Shannon (Revolutionary Road, Premium Rush, Man of Steel) as The White Death, Bad Bunny (F9, El Muerto) as The Wolf, Zazie Beetz (Atlanta, Deadpool 2, Joker) and The Hornet, Logan Lerman (Percy Jackson 1 and 2, The Perks of Being a Wallflower, Fury) as The Son, and Sandra Bullock (The Blind Side, Gravity, The Lost City) and Maria Beetle. 

Overall, Bullet Train may not be among David Leitch’s best directing efforts, but for those looking for a dumb, fun popcorn movie with a lot of ridiculous fight sequences, cheesy dialogue, and a colorful cast of characters, you’ll probably have a good time on this “Train”. It’s the kind of film where if you’ve seen the trailer then you know what you’re getting into. 

The action is very stylized, often absurd, and unapologetically bloody with characters constantly getting killed and maimed in over-the-top ways. Probably my favorite action sequence in the film is when Brad Pitt and Brian Tyree Henry are fighting each other in the Quiet Car of the train and they somehow have to fight while making as little noise as possible, it’s a well-crafted action scene and an incredibly funny one as well. 

All the characters are very memorable, and it’s entertaining to see and hear them interact with one another, I also like how even the side characters or characters who appear for an action scene or two still play a part in the story. Brad Pitt is funny and charming as this seasoned assassin who has a terrible case of bad luck where even when he’s trying to get the job done easy and clean, people will somehow throw themselves into harm’s way due to his actions. 

Some of the standout performances are Aaron Taylor-Johnson and Brian Tyree Henry as the brothers, Tangerine and Lemon. These two are very funny whenever they’re onscreen together, from their banter and arguments to how one of them is literally obsessed with Thomas the Tank Engine (I am not making that up!), I also got a kick out of Joey King as this assassin disguised as a schoolgirl who has a plot of her own, she’s the kind of villain you love to hate and it sounds like King is having a lot of fun with her performance. 

While the film exceeds in style, action, and characters, it somewhat lacks in story, pacing, and editing. The basic premise is easy to understand, but as the film goes on it does get more and more convoluted with characters and plot points appearing, disappearing, and reappearing at random times. 

Many of the characters’ backstories are told through flashbacks and while a few of those can be entertaining and offer hindsight as to who they are and what their motives are, most of them distract from the situations currently happening on the train to the point where they literally did flashbacks for both a snake and a water bottle. Had these flashbacks been worked into the story better and with less choppy editing, I think they would have been fine, but as is they’re mostly unnecessary and could easily be trimmed down or removed entirely. 

Aside from a few bumpy detours, I found myself mostly satisfied with Bullet Train, it’s not a perfect movie by any means, but for people looking for an over-the-top and silly throwback to films like Snatch or Smokin’ Aces, you got yourself a blood-stained ticket for a train ride of violence-filled fun.