The King of Staten Island review

THE KING OF STATEN ISLAND: 

A LITTLE UNEVEN, BUT THIS COMING-OF-AGE DRAMEDY SUCCESSFULLY SHOWCASES JUDD APATOW’S MORE MATURE SIDE AS A DIRECTOR! 

By Nico Beland

Movie Review: *** out of 4

UNIVERSAL PICTURES

Pete Davidson in The King of Staten Island

            A 24-year-old high school dropout who lost his firefighter father when he was young, tries to get his life together in The King of Staten Island. The new comedy-drama film from director Judd Apatow (The 40-Year-Old Virgin, Knocked Up, Trainwreck) and written by and starring Pete Davidson (Saturday Night Live, The Jesus Rolls, The Suicide Squad), loosely based on his own life as Davidson lost his father, who was a firefighter during the September 11 attacks. 

            That’s some pretty heavy subject matter especially for someone like Judd Apatow to bring to the screen, as he is usually known for directing comedies like Knocked Up and Trainwreck. But you know what? Despite some flaws, Apatow brings The King of Staten Island to the screen wonderfully in one of his more mature outings as a director by blending his trademark comedic tone with genuine drama, and a compelling performance by Davidson as the film’s protagonist. 

            The film follows Scott Carlin (Davidson), who ever since his firefighter father died in a fire when he was young has been a case of arrested development. Now in his mid-20s and has achieved very little but desires to pursue his dream of becoming a tattoo artist, Scott lives with his exhausted ER nurse mother Margie (Marisa Tomei-My Cousin Vinny, Crazy Stupid Love, Spider-Man: Homecoming/Far From Home) while his ambitious younger sister Claire (Maude Apatow-Knocked Up, Funny People, Euphoria) heads off to college. 

            He spends most of his time smoking weed, hanging out with his friends, and is secretly hooking up with his childhood friend Kelsey (Bel Powley-Mary Shelley, White Boy Rick, The Morning Show). However, Scott gets one hell of a wakeup call when he discovers his mom has been seeing a loudmouth firefighter named Ray (Bill Burr-Breaking Bad, F Is for Family, Daddy’s Home 1 and 2) whose son Scott attempted to draw a tattoo on after being asked, but ran away after drawing a single line. 

            Initially, Scott does not like the idea of his mother dating another fireman because it reminds him all too much of his dad and tries to break them up. However, this sets off a chain of events forcing him to fight with his grief and take his first tentative steps toward moving forward in his life. 

            The film also stars Steve Buscemi (Reservoir Dogs, Desperado, The Big Lebowski) as Papa, Pamela Adlon (King of the Hill, Recess, Bumblebee) as Gina, Jimmy Tatro (22 Jump Street, American Vandal, Stuber) as Firefighter Savage, Kevin Corrigan (Grounded for Life, The Departed, Superbad) as Joe, Dominic Lombardozzi (A Bronx Tale, Cold Pursuit, The Irishman) as Firefighter Lockwood, Moisés Arias (The Kings of Summer, Ender’s Game, Pitch Perfect 3) as Igor, and Cathy Aquilino (Girl Code) as Tara. 

            Overall, The King of Staten Island may not live up to Apatow’s earlier work, but it shows that he can do more than raunchy comedies with a lot of pot smoking and sex jokes. He is able to blend this mature subject matter with his trademark style of comedy and for the most part it works. 

            At times, it can be a little unfocused like one-minute Scott will be smoking pot with his friends and making crude jokes and getting into all kinds of wacky shenanigans followed by a heated argument and fight between him and Ray. Sometimes it feels like the movie isn’t sure whether it wants to extremely funny or really dramatic, in my opinion it mostly works aside from a few awkward moments. 

            The only other issue I have with this movie is the length, the film clocks in at 2 hours and 17 minutes which to me felt too long for something like this. It’s a movie about a 24-year-old man trying to figure out what to do with his life, this could have easily been sliced down to an hour and a half movie and it would have been fine, probably better. 

I was never bored by it or anything but there are some slow moments that I felt could have been cut and I did notice the runtime around the middle. It isn’t overwhelmingly long, but the runtime was rather noticeable and could have been shorter. 

The highlight of this movie are the performances, particularly from Pete Davidson, Marisa Tomei, and Bill Burr. Granted, I haven’t seen Pete Davidson in many films or TV shows but his performance in this is really good and given that this is a very personal project for him you can see elements of both the character and the actor whenever he’s onscreen. 

At first, I was ready to hate Davidson’s character because he starts out as this extremely unlikable, arrogant, and irresponsible jerk who quickly gets on everyone’s nerves. But you understand what he’s going through and as the film progresses, he learns the errors of his ways and tries to make everything right, he even has some heartfelt bonding moments with Bill Burr and the two kids. 

Bill Burr’s character was a pleasant surprise because on the surface you’d probably think he’d be just a straight up asshole, but like Scott has a revelation by the end learns the value of family. It’s kind of like Mr. Woodcock…except made by much smarter people who knew what they were doing, even Marisa Tomei has some scene-stealing moments though not quite as many as Davidson and Burr. 

The King of Staten Island is a funny and thoughtful coming-of-age story and one of Judd Apatow’s more mature outings as a director. A little rough around the edges and lengthy, but the charm of the film’s cast keeps the movie afloat. 

This is definitely a trip to Staten Island worth taking. 

Artemis Fowl review

ARTEMIS FOWL: 

BELOVED YOING-ADULT FILM ADAPTATION COMMITS THE HEINOUS CRIMES OF BOREDOM AND SEVERELY LACKING THE MAGIC OF ITS SOURCE MATERIAL! 

By Nico Beland

Movie Review: * ½ out of 4

DISNEY+

Lara McDonnell, Judi Dench, Josh Gad, Ferdia Shaw, Nonso Anozie, Tamara Smart, and Colin Farrell in Artemis Fowl

            A 12-year-old prodigy goes on a mission to rescue his kidnapped father in Artemis Fowl, based on the book of the same name by Eoin Colfer and is the latest film adaptation of a popular young-adult novel. The film had been in development hell for years shortly after the book was published in 2001 and was originally intended to be a Miramaxrelease until Disney acquired the rights in 2013. 

            Throughout its production history, the film went through several directors and writers until finally Kenneth Branagh (Hamlet (1996), Thor, Cinderella (2015)) was brought onboard to helm the movie. When the movie was officially announced, admittedly I was interested in seeing what they were going to do with Colfer’s story. 

            I remembered reading the book in school as a kid though my memory of it is very hazy, but I’m familiar with the premise of it. A child prodigy and his faithful servant befriend a fairy and a dwarf to rescue his kidnapped father from a gang of pixies looking to reclaim an artifact that was stolen by the Fowl family, sounds like there could be a lot of potential for a movie with this set-up. 

            Sadly, the red flags started to show their ugly selves as the movie was originally scheduled for an August 2019 theatrical release but was constantly pushed back and just before it was able to secure a May 2020 release, the COVID-19 pandemic struck and the film was dropped onto the Disney+ streaming service as a last resort. So, after all that trouble behind the scenes and during post-production, how does Artemis Fowl translate to film? Ummm…badly…very, VERY badly! 

            I wasn’t expecting Artemis Fowl to be anything great when the teaser trailer debuted a year and a half ago, but I was not expecting it to be this bad. How does a story with so much imagination and potential for a film turn into such a bland, thinly plotted, and overblown mess? This is the visual equivalent of watching Disney set $125 million (The film’s budget) on fire, Dark Knight Joker style. 

            It plays like a 90-minute compilation of scenes awkwardly stitched together with nothing of real substance and it seems like there were a lot of important scenes left on the cutting-room floor because apparently this young-adult book adaptation needs to be under 100 minutes for some reason. 

            Pile bad acting, a weak script, and overblown but terribly edited action sequences on top of it and you got a huge misfire in the Disney film library. It might very well be one of the Top 5 Worst Movies I’ve Ever Seen with the Disney name alongside Mr. Magoo, The Lone Ranger, The Haunted Mansion, and Inspector Gadget. 

            The film follows Artemis Fowl II (Newcomer, Ferdia Shaw), a 12-year-old genius, criminal mastermind, and millionaire who lives at Fowl Manor in Ireland with his father, Artemis Sr. (Colin Farrell-Daredevil, Seven Psychopaths, Dumbo (2019)). Suddenly, his father gets kidnapped and is accused of the theft of priceless artifacts leaving his son to discover the truth about his family. 

            It turns out the Fowl family has stolen ancient artifacts and documented the existence of mythical creatures such as fairies, dwarves, and trolls, and a mysterious hooded figure holding Artemis’ father captive tells him to find the Aculous, an artifact stolen and hidden by the Fowls in exchange for his father’s life. 

            Artemis, with the help of his loyal butler Dom (Nonso Anozie-RocknRolla, Cinderella (2015), Game of Thrones), a fairy cop known as Holly Short (Newcomer, Lara McDonnell), and a dwarf named Mulch (Josh Gad-Frozen 1 and 2, The Angry Birds Movie 1 and 2, Beauty and the Beast (2017)) must locate the Aculous and use its power to save his father before time runs out. 

            The film also stars newcomer, Tamara Smart as Juliet, Judi Dench (Shakespeare in Love, James Bond franchise, The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel) as Commander Julius Root, Hong Chau (Inherent Vice, Downsizing, Watchmen (HBOSeries)) as Opal Koboi, Nikesh Patel (Midsomer Murders, Indian Summers, Doctor Who) as Foaly, and Joshua McGuire (The Hour, Mr. Turner, Cinderella (2015)) as Briar Cudgeon. 

            Overall, Artemis Fowl fails to recapture the magic and bold storytelling of the book and instead turns a story that has a lot of potential for a movie into another generic, tiresome young-adult adaptation with one-dimensional characters, wooden acting, practically paper-thin plot, and loud, overblown, and badly edited action sequences to boot. I’ll give the film some credit that it’s at least visually appealing with Branagh’s trademark monumental directing style in check, but why does it matter when your characters are dull, not enough substance to keep the audience invested, and lacking in world building and character development? 

            But let’s get to my biggest problem with this movie, it’s BORING! Yeah, they somehow manage to make a movie about 12-year-old criminal mastermind, a fairy cop, and a dwarf with a cartoonishly big mouth reminiscent of The Mask boring, that is more of a crime that any of the Fowl family’s robberies. 

            Most of the movie takes place in a house, the action sequences have an overabundance of unconvincing CGI, the camera work is dizzying during the action, the non-human character designs feel ripped from other movies (The giant troll looks exactly like a Warcraft orc, bad CGI and all), and the performance by Shaw is terrible and fails to leave an impression. I feel so bad criticizing this kid’s performance since this is his first acting role in a feature film, but hopefully he’ll be able to get good work in the future, also the plot is somehow both complex and empty at the same time

            It’s a shame because I can see a movie like this working had the script, directing, and acting were better. There is enough material in Colfer’s book that could be translated to film, but it all boils down to execution and this is how not to do a Y.A. book adaptation. 

            Artemis Fowl is awful, plain and simple. It fails both as an adaptation of the book and as a movie in general, when you decide to watch it, everyone loses. 

The Lovebirds review

THE LOVEBIRDS: 

WILD NIGHT ROM-COM IS A FUNNY ALBEIT FORMULAIC TIME WASTER! 

By Nico Beland

Movie Review: *** out of 4

NETFLIX AND PARAMOUNT PICTURES

Kumail Nanjiani and Issa Rae in The Lovebirds

            A couple unintentionally gets tangled up in a murder mystery plot in The Lovebirds, the new romantic-comedy directed by Michael Showalter (Wet Hot American Summer, Hello, My Name is Doris, The Big Sick) and starring Kumail Nanjiani (Silicon Valley, The Big Sick, Stuber) and Issa Rae (Insecure, The Hate U Give, The Photograph). Originally scheduled for a theatrical release by Paramount but was delayed due to the closing of movie theaters during the COVID-19 pandemic to the point where the studio decided to pawn it off to Netflix. 

            This is Showalter and Nanjiani’s second collaboration together following The Big Sick in 2017 which was unanimously praised by critics and audiences with its smart writing, bold characters, and legitimate drama, clearly The Lovebirds will be a worthy follow-up to that movie…Eh, not exactly. While The Big Sick is a movie with a lot of replay value, The Lovebirds comes off as a perfectly average and enjoyable time waster while you’re in the moment and never watch it again afterwards. 

            The concept of a bickering couple getting roped into a wild night of shenanigans that brings them closer together by the end is nothing new and this film doesn’t really add much variety to that formula anyway. If you’ve seen the 2010 Steve Carell and Tina Fey comedy, Date Night then you pretty much already know the plot of this movie. 

            However, much like Date Night the chemistry between its leads is where the movie shines and a good chunk of the humor, though I’ll go on record and say I did not laugh nearly as often as I did with Date Night. It’s not a bad thing but I just want to throw that out there, with all that out of the way, let’s talk about The Lovebirds.

            The film follows Jibran (Nanjiani) and Leilani (Rae), who have been together for quite some time, and it really shows in their relationship. They both constantly argue about a variety of things and they just don’t have the same affection for each other that they had four years ago. 

            However, these two “Lovebirds” get in a huge pickle when Jibran accidentally hits a biker with his car and a mysterious man with a Mustache (Paul Sparks-Boardwalk Empire, House of Cards, Thoroughbreds) claiming to be a cop hijacks the car to repeatedly run the biker over and over again to death…oh, and he flees from the scene immediately afterwards. Believing they will be blamed for the crime because of their indescribable story and racial profiling, Jibran and Leilani go on a wild and outrageous journey to clear their names from one hilarious situation to the next. 

            The film also stars Anna Camp (True Blood, Pitch Perfect trilogy, Café Society) as Edie, Kyle Bornheimer (Brooklyn Nine-Nine, Casual, Marriage Story) as Brett, and Moses Storm (Unfriended, Father of the Year, Sunnyside) as Steve. 

            Overall, The Lovebirds is a moderately fun comedy romp with some laughs, a gripping mystery, and strong performances by its leads. It isn’t perfect though, at times some of the jokes feel extremely forced, and both Kumail Nanjiani and Issa Rae constantly bicker and ramble all throughout the film; sometimes it can be funny but other times it feels like their long, rapid-speaking dialogue grinds the movie to a halt and you just want them to shut up for about 5 minutes. 

            With that said, Kumail and Issa’s performances are quite good despite their bickering getting annoying after a while. Kumail is pretty much portraying the same character he played in Stuber, but it works for a movie like this and Issa as the loud, ecstatic girlfriend, they (almost) work perfectly but their characters take a dive into constant arguing for most of the running time. 

            I get it, their relationship isn’t as strong as it used to be, but do they really need to argue and bicker every chance they get? It’s an issue with both the characters and the plot itself because literally as soon as their romantic first date ends and the “Four Years Later” text appears they’re in the middle of an argument and their relationship is starting to fall apart, I would have preferred more buildup to that so it would be easier to grow attached to them and root for them to get back together by the end, as is it feels a bit rushed. 

            The Lovebirds doesn’t quite offer the wild night comedy its trailers advertised, but it makes for a perfectly serviceable one-viewing movie. It has its funny moments and the performances by Kumail and Issa are good for this kind of movie, if you’re curious then it wouldn’t hurt to give it a watch. 

            However, if you’re looking for a non-stop laugh riot, you’d be better off watching Date Night instead. The Lovebirds is funny, but it doesn’t really leave an impression once it ends, so be a little cautious while watching it.