Zoolander 2 review

ZOOLANDER 2:

BIG ON CELEBRITY CAMEOS, BUT SHORT ON LAUGHS!

By Nico Beland

Movie Review: ** out of 4

PARAMOUNT PICTURES

Ben Stiller brings Blue Steel back in Zoolander 2

            JUSTIN BIEBER DIES IN THE MOVIE…AWESOME!

            Okay I got that out, anyway, Ben Stiller (Madagascar trilogy, Night at the Museum trilogy, Tropic Thunder) returns as the dim-witted model and master of Blue Steel, Derek Zoolander in Zoolander 2, the sequel to the 2001 comedy hit, Zoolander. The first Zoolander was a comedy I enjoyed a lot when I was younger, I don’t consider it a comedic great but with its goofy charm, silly humor, and clever satire of the fashion industry, it was my favorite Ben Stiller comedy at the time until Tropic Thunder came along in 2008.

             Zoolander was a comedy that felt very self-aware of just how silly its premise is, a hot male model whose career goes downhill when a rival model steps in, and then he gets the aid of an evil fashion mogul to get his career back on track, but then the mogul brainwashes him into assassinating the Prime Minister. I watched the first movie the night before seeing this one, and I haven’t seen the first movie in a while and I came out and said “This is one of the silliest movie ideas ever!” Not really a shock I know.

            It’s no comedic masterpiece, but it’s a very entertaining movie that offers plenty of belly laughs and everything felt right with the world. Then comes the sequel, Zoolander 2, released over ten years since the first movie.

            Talk about being late in the game to do a sequel to Zoolander, usually comedy sequels are made only to capitalize on the success of the first movie. Especially if they’re being made several years after the first movie, think about it, Dumb and Dumber To, Blues Brothers 2000, and need I mention Son of the Mask?

            However sometimes if the studio is really lucky, a comedy sequel to a movie released several years after the first film can be as good and sometimes better like 2014's 22 Jump Street or on the Will Ferrell side of things, 2013’s Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues because for a movie that should have been dead on arrival, Anchorman 2 was a pleasant surprise and had plenty of goofy humor and new elements thrown in that didn't feel like a rehash of the first movie, it’s a good movie and an example of how to do a comedy sequel properly.

            Zoolander 2 unfortunately is not one of those sequels as it relies more on cramming in as many celebrity cameos as possible rather then developing jokes, granted some of the cameos get a laugh but others feel like they were just thrown in because they’re popular as a half-ass attempt to market to the hip new generation. And an obvious flaw of almost every unnecessary comedy sequel, constantly rehashing the first movie.

            After the events of the first Zoolander, we find former male supermodel, Derek Zoolander (Stiller) trying to get over the loss of his girlfriend, Matilda Jeffries (Christine Taylor-The Brady Bunch Movie, Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story, Tropic Thunder) after the Derek Zoolander Center for Kids Who Can’t Read Good collapsed literally two days after its Grand Opening, killing her and apparently deforming his former rival turned partner, Hansel (Owen Wilson-Starsky & Hutch, Fantastic Mr. Fox, Midnight in Paris) and resulting in his son, Derek Jr. being put into an orphanage. Until he is called in by sexy Fashion Interpol officer, Melanie Valentina (Penélope Cruz-Volver, Vicky Christina Barcelona, Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides) and recruited with Hansel to track down a group of assassins that have been murdering the world’s most beautiful people.

            Derek, Hansel, and Melanie infiltrate a new world of fashion and the evolution of fashion to put a stop to the assassins. The new fashion world leads our “Really Ridiculously Good Looking” heroes to Derek’s old arch nemesis, Jacobim Mugatu (Will Ferrell-Anchorman, Talladega Nights, Blades of Glory) who escaped from prison and is out for revenge on Derek.

            Overall, there’s really no point in Zoolander 2 existing, the first film felt very self contained and probably should have stayed that way. To call it one of the worst comedies ever made would be incorrect, it’s not even close to being considered the worst comedies of the new era, especially after all the Happy Madison and Wayans Brothers productions that keep coming out.

            To the film’s credit, it has its comedic moments, the few celebrity cameos that are funny and not overstuffed with other celebrities, the absurd and exaggerated humor that the first film had, the traditional Ben Stiller facial expressions, and some new takes on old clichés, not to mention seeing Stiller, Wilson, and Ferrell reprise their iconic characters is undeniably charming, this could have been the Anchorman 2 of Zoolander movies. Unfortunately, the script has several plot holes, most of the jokes and gags are stale, the constant rehashing and references to the first movie, and if you’ve seen the first movie you already know exactly how they stop Mugatu here.

            If you’re a fan of Zoolander and just want to see how the story continues, maybe you’ll see something in Zoolander 2 that I didn’t and possibly have a fun time, but if you want a really funny comedy that's actually clever, I’m sure Deadpool or Hail, Caesar! are playing next door.       

Deadpool review

DEADPOOL:

A VULGAR, VIOLENT, AND MEAN-SPIRITED MARVEL COMICS MOVIE IN THE BEST WAYS!

By Nico Beland

Movie Review: **** out of 4

20^TH CENTURY FOX AND MARVEL ENTERTAINMENT

Ryan Reynolds as the Merc with a Mouth, Deadpool

            Where do I start with this movie? After last year’s colossally disappointing Fantastic Four movie, 20^th Century Fox gives one more shot at adapting a popular Marvel Comics superhero into a movie. In an age where the Marvel Cinematic Universe and the Avengers films seem to be the big superhero moneymakers, sometimes you want something a little different in your comic book entertainment that doesn't have the Mickey Mouse ears on it and while there's been plenty of superhero movies for adults before this, very few of them were as well-regarded or successful as more family-friendly, PG-13 comic book movies we get now. 

            So seeing how they “Supposedly” used Deadpool before in the 2009 X-Men prequel, X-Men Origins: Wolverine with Ryan Reynolds (National Lampoon's Van Wilder, The Proposal, Green Lantern) portraying the character, 20^th Century Fox decided to give Deadpool his own movie with Reynolds reprising the role. And wow, talk about the complete opposite of the X-Men Origins Deadpool, this Deadpool is cocky, arrogant, violent, egocentric, vulgar, fourth-wall breaking, always cracking one-liners, should I keep going? To put it simply, I loved every minute of this film and might even be among my favorite comic book movies.

            Parents and guardians of young children, I know a lot of you like to take your kids to see comic book movies, but HEAR THESE WORDS COMING OUT OF MY GODDAMN MOUTH! Do Not, I repeat DO NOT take your kids to see this one (Actually, take the kids to this one, everyone should see this movie)! That’s right, this is the first R-rated Marvel movie since 2008’s Punisher: War Zone and the first R-rated X-Men movie for good reasons.

            Unlike the child-friendly X-Men or Fantastic 4 movies, Deadpool makes gritty and darkly comical superhero entertainment popular again, it’s bloody, foul-mouthed, filled with lots of sex jokes, and of course those Fucking F-Bombs. On top of all that, it also has a strong story, surprisingly lovable characters, and even a few heartfelt moments woven into the ultra-violence and comedy. 

            The film follows Wade Wilson (Reynolds), who spends his time as a hired mercenary protecting teenage girls from stalkers. He soon meets the sexy, Vanessa Carlysle (Morena Baccarin-Firefly, Stargate SG-1, Gotham) and the two of them get together and have sex every Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, and other holidays nobody really cares about. 

They’re just living an awesome life, until they discover that Wade has a supposedly incurable cancer, so they try to make the best of what he has left. In comes The Recruiter (Jed Rees-The X-Files, Hawkeye, Galaxy Quest) of the secret Weapon X program enlists Wade into the program to possibly cure his cancer and make him not just better, but better than better.

So after countless considerations and chats with his bartender friend, Weasel (T.J. Miller-How to Train Your Dragon 1 and 2, Transformers: Age of Extinction, Big Hero 6), Wade decides to go through the experiment being handled by Francis Freeman (Ed Skrein-Game of Thrones, The Transporter: Refueled) to remove his cancer and apparently become a superhero. At least that’s what The Recruiter tells Wade, but after the mutation serum is injected into Wade and several days of being tortured by Angel Dust (Gina Carano-Haywire, Fast & Furious 6, Extraction) to activate the mutation, Wade transforms into a hideous freak of nature that resembles Freddy Krueger’s face fucking a topographical map of Utah and an avocado having sex with an older, more disgusting avocado, as quoted by Miller. 

Wade suits up and becomes the foul-mouthed superhero, Deadpool, armed with ninja swords, firepower, a bad mouth, and constant fourth wall breaks to hunt down the bastards that deformed his face and possibly his sex life. On a quest for vengeance against Francis, Deadpool teams up with X-Men mutants, Colossus (Stefan Kapicic-24, The Brothers Bloom, Big Miracle) and Negasonic Teenage Warhead (Brianna Hildebrand), a superfast mutant who makes Sonic the Hedgehog look like a snail, to slaughter the bad guys and hopefully get back together with Vanessa. 

Overall, Deadpool knows exactly what it wants to be, a different type of superhero movie that doesn’t rely on any of the traditional comic book movie clichés and delivers a fun, energetic movie that’s worth multiple viewings, at least that’s what I got out of it. 

The movie did not disappoint, especially for a February comic book movie release, because this is usually the time where mediocre or just plain bad comic book movies are released. Remember the Ben Affleck Daredevil movie or the Nicolas Cage Ghost Rider movies? Yeah, those came out around this time, but fortunately for us, Deadpool shoots those motherfuckers down and gives us a thoroughly enjoyable February comic book movie release that doesn't fall victim to its predecessors' trappings. 

I'll admit it is a little strange to see the R-rated Deadpool take place in the more PG-13 X-Men universe especially with how different the tones are. The X-Men movies are more serious and tackles heavy themes like prejudice and here we have Deadpool slicing bad guys up and making wise cracks in the same universe. 

I don't know what else to say, I had such a great time with Deadpool and it gave me exactly what I wanted to see in a film based on this character. If you’re a fan of over-the-top action doused in blood and other adult-oriented comic book movies like The Crow, Sin City, Watchmen, or Kick-Ass, you’ll definitely enjoy this film, I loved it and I look forward to more viewings of it in the future. 

See it or I’ll cut your fucking head off, stab your friends with swords and make a kabob out of them! 

Take it away Pool!

Pride + Prejudice + Zombies review

PRIDE + PREJUDICE + ZOMBIES:

A BLOODY LOVELY FUN TIME!

By Nico Beland

Movie Review: *** out of 4

SCREEN GEMS

It’s Beautifully Badass VS the Undead in Pride + Prejudice + Zombies

            From director Burr Steers (17 Again, Charlie St. Cloud) comes a film adaptation of the incredibly popular horror-comedy parody novel, Pride + Prejudice + Zombies, an obvious satire of the Jane Austen classic novel, Pride + Prejudice. I can tell you right now after all the Scary Movies and Haunted Houses we keep getting from Hollywood, THIS I can gladly consider an ACTUAL parody movie worth watching and can be enjoyed.

            It doesn’t spoof specific movies but rather two specific genres, a Jane Austen style period romance and classic zombie horror movies. The result, an irreverently entertaining time at the movies, the blend of romance and horror in this works quite well, it doesn’t go straight up bland, lifeless romance with supernatural elements like the Twilight movies, but rather half romance, half zombie comedy, but it isn’t anything like Warm Bodies, so no sexy zombies here.

            It’s hard to categorize exactly what kind of horror-comedy this is, but what does make the film truly shine is the talented cast, cinematography, 1800 era cliché satires, and lots of action. I haven’t read the book in a while so I’m not entirely sure how it holds up to its print form, but in terms of being an entertaining movie, it’s good popcorn fun, don’t expect any Oscar® material with this, the film does not take itself seriously, thus resulting in a silly fun time.

            Set in 19^th Century England, a zombie outbreak has fallen upon the land of Jane Austen’s classic tale, Pride + Prejudice of relationships between lovers of different social classes. The film follows beautiful but feisty heroine, Elizabeth Bennet (Lily James-Downton Abbey, Cinderella (2015) who is a master of martial arts and weaponry and fierce zombie hunter and epitome of upper class prejudice, Mr. Darcy (Sam Reilly-Control, On the Road, Maleficent).

            As the zombie apocalypse gets out of hand, Elizabeth and Mr. Darcy must swallow their pride, take out their weapons, and battle the Undead on the blood-soaked battlefield.

            The film also stars Jack Huston (American Hustle, The Longest Ride, Hail, Caesar!) as Mr. Wickham, Bella Heathcote (In Time, Dark Shadows) as Jane Bennet, Douglas Booth (Noah, Jupiter Ascending) as Mr. Bingley, Matt Smith (In Bruges, Doctor Who, Terminator: Genisys) as Mr. Collins, Charles Dance (Underworld: Awakening, The Imitation Game, Woman in Gold) as Mr. Bennet, Lena Headey (The Brothers Grimm, 300, Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles) as Lady Catherine de Bourgh, Suki Waterhouse (Material Girl, The Divergent Series: Insurgent) as Catherine “Kitty” Bennet, newcomers, Ellie Bamber and Millie Brady as Lydia and Mary Bennet, and Sally Phillips (Bridget Jones’ Diary, Miranda, Jam and Jerusalem) as Mrs. Bennet.

            Overall, Pride + Prejudice + Zombies is a fun horror-comedy that delivers what it promises, beautiful, badass women battling supernatural beings, pretty much exactly what Bella Swan wishes she was. It cleverly mixes chick-flick romance with zombie horror, so no need to argue with your girlfriend about picking between a romance or a horror action movie.

            The cast, for the most part are developed well, for a movie with the title “Pride + Prejudice + Zombies”, especially Lily James, she’s really expanding her acting talents because when I think of her, I usually think of her Downton Abbey character or Cinderella, her character in this is like if you made her Downton Abbey and Cinderella characters into badass babes. I hope she surprises me with other acting roles in the future, because she’s becoming one of my new favorite actresses in film.

            The film does have a lot of hokey moments that I’m assuming are played for laughs since this is basically a spoof of 19^th Century lifestyle. And fortunately it doesn’t get in the way of some kickass zombie action with beautiful women, it succeeds in appealing to both women and men at the same time.

            If you’re a fan of traditional gory zombie films, this might not be your movie because it doesn’t step into R-rated gore territory, though it does have its moments of intensity. But if you’re a fan of Jane Austen and zombie movies, you’ll probably enjoy this movie, after all it has Pride, it has Prejudice, and best of all, Zombies.